On an overcast Tuesday, I set up in Bethesda Fountain and immediately snagged a man and 2 women from Lebanon and Dubai.  The man informed me he’d been to Hawaii but had never hula-ed.  One of the women said, “It’s easy, just pretend you are the ocean waves.”

“Exactly.”  I took them through 2 verses of “The Hukilau Song.”  During the second verse, one of the women broke through the constraints of the traditional hula, and, arms flailing, pranced around the others with abandon.  When they’d returned the leis, I looked down to find a fiver in my case.

A man off the bench gave me a dollar.

Then I heard the accordion, and my aloha spirit was replaced with a low-level rage.  It was the Italian man who’d cursed me out last time I’d asked him not to set up so close to me.  ( http://www.mrukulele.com/?p=1092(opens in a new tab)). Before I had a chance to consider what, if anything, to do about him, I was in his face.  “We’ve talked about this before,” I began.  “When you see me playing, you move somewhere else.  You don’t set up on top of me.”

He sputtered something in Italian.  “I don’t understand a word you’re saying.”  More Italian.  I turned my back and returned to my spot.  I strummed out some chord patterns until I regained my composure, then began singing “Making Love Ukulele Style.”  By the time I finished, the accordionist was gone.

Two little kids came off the bench, each holding a handful of coins to toss in my case.  Neither wanted to hula.

The rain clouds churned overhead.  A few drops hit the ground, but the sun soon burned through; all those who had stood up to leave sat down again.

A 50-something woman came forward with a dollar.  “Why don’t you play something Hawaiian?”

“Are you from Hawaii?”

“Yes.”

I reached for a lei.  “How about you hula to ‘The Hukilau Song?’”

“No, no, no,” she said, taking a few steps backward.  “I don’t dance.”

At the end of my set, I stuffed $8.06 in my pocket.  On my way out of the park I saw the Italian accordionist, sitting on his stool, wheezing out the “Theme from the Godfather.”